I was recently (2003) chatting with a friend who brought the topic that people sometimes "let go" of themselves while their lives are going through change. Specifically, I am referring to the downward spiral of normal daily activities. This subject is important as an indicator of how you are really doing in terms of obsessing, letting go, moving on, etc.

I would like to point out that some people are naturally messy, disorganized, forgetful, unmotivated, and/or clutter bugs. What I am referring to is the sudden or gradual slide into one of those aforementioned behaviors that are out of character to a person's natural state of being.

If your daily life has changed in a "not-so-great" way, it may be due to your current mind set or emotions. Looking around your home can give you a front row seat to the inner workings of your psyche. What we are going through internally usually manifests somewhere in our external world.

Feeling content has a lot to do with feeling comfortable with the balance in your life. Not every little detail has to be perfect, but most major aspects need to be going well for this balance. And if one major area is not going well, it usually requires a feeling that that area will be going well soon due to plans and goals you have set in motion.

If your life is going well in health, friends, love life, and family but your career is on the fritz, you can still find balance as long as you feel there is a light at the end of the career tunnel. Usually that light comes from within, not without. The prospect of an interview or job offer definitely helps, but feeling like you can get it together and find what you are looking for in the end is the real light.

Without that balance you risk other areas of your life getting infected by the problem area. If you are not making peace with your issues, they are making war on you. One problem suddenly interferes with a healthy part of your life creating two problems. Two becomes three and before you know it you have let one issue take control of your daily life.

The daily life is the routine that you thrive on. It is different for everyone since it is what makes each of us feel good about living through each day. It is helpful to determine what your ideal daily life is so that you can recognize the times your routine falters. A lot of times we progress into depression or dwelling so slowly that we are unaware of the drastic down turn. Being able to identify major signs in your behavior can eliminate a total breakdown.

There are of course times where our daily life falters that are not related to problems. Instead, they are related to chaos and lack of time. You just get so busy that you cannot possibly squeeze in your daily 15 minute meditation or even call your best friend back. We go through this periodically when everything is important all at once.

My most memorable phase was when I was graduating college. Within a four week time frame I had to work a full time job, study for finals, write four papers, find a 'real life' job, find a new apartment and pack because our lease was up a week after graduation. Oh and the best was that part of my extended family was coming to see me graduate and I felt pressure to find things for them to do while I was busy taking care of all that other stuff.

What is amazing is that I sailed through all of it with only minor frustration and I accidentally missed one final exam because my usually organized self got the date wrong. I was surprised to to show up on Thursday morning to find a room full of people I did not know. I was even more surprised to find out the exam for my class had been held the day before. Thankfully I was able to beg my professor into letting me take it.

However, my daily life suffered immensely. I forgot what a television looked like and what my favorite shows were. Laundry, cleaning and dishes only got done when it was absolutely necessary. My phone lay silent as I had no time to gab to my friends and even my bed missed me because I was not able to sleep as much as usual. My life became consumed with understanding the political implications of 18th century Africa on current affairs, finding the right dress for graduation (hello, it's under a robe!) and asking everyone I knew, "do you have any boxes?" My whole focus changed and my previous concerns just had to wait.

It is okay in these circumstances for our daily life to become unimportant. Sometimes you just do not have a choice about it because life takes over. And when it is all done, life gives you back your daily routine. You have to focus on things that you normally do not think about.

What is your daily routine? For instance; for me to feel balance I need to stick to a minor daily routine, feel organized, have a sense of accomplishment.  As long as I pick up after myself, make my bed, and do the dishes I feel like the day was somewhat of a success.  If I do not even do that much, I know I am either super busy or something is bothering me.  Figure out your routine, even if it is only one or two things that you do daily that make you feel good.

You do not have to be a powerhouse super-human to feel like you accomplished something. It is the small details of our daily life that are what gives us a sense of security and peacefulness. So look around your home or office and ask yourself, "is this space up to par like it would be if I was feeling really good?" "Is this space showing me how I'm really feeling?"

Now I want you to make a conscious effort to do your daily routine even when you do not feel so great. When you start letting the little things slide, take notice and do them anyway! They do not get done by themselves and you will feel a small spark of "feeling good" if you keep to your routine even if your emotional life is a mess.

© 2003 MoonAngel's Web